


Brahms Heelshire: "___" Would Include...

by BOOdalinski



Series: Slashers Need Love [7]
Category: The Boy (2016 Bell)
Genre: Chubby Reader, F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-10
Updated: 2020-01-06
Packaged: 2020-02-29 08:04:42
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 5,969
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18774601
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BOOdalinski/pseuds/BOOdalinski
Summary: Are you ready to learn about your life with the thrilling Brahms Heelshire? *Hint: click the link*Ch 1:Brahms Heelshire with a Plus-Sized S/OCh 2:Brahms Heelshire Having a Lactation KinkCh 3:Q/A - How Do Brahms' Bills Get Paid?Ch 4:Q/A - Character StudyCh 5:Brahms Heelshire's Reaction to Jump ScaresCh 6:Why Brahms Sucks at Consent





	1. Plus-Sized S/O

**Author's Note:**

> _Anonymous: Hi! I just want to say that I really love your work and if you could write about Brahms with a plus sized s/o. Have a great day!_

**● He’d want to explore your body.**  Your body’s so plush and yielding–nothing like his own lithe figure. Reminding him of Renaissance beauties, he’d view you as a classical masterpiece. _So this is what an angel feels like_. He’ll spend hours trailing his hands along your limbs, amazed by how soft you are. 

> **Note:**  Once he realizes his ability to turn you on through touch, you’re in trouble. Expect lots of heavy petting…then just blatant sex.

****●** Endless Snuggling.** As you quickly learned upon moving into Heelshire Manor, old country houses can be drafty. Now imagine living in the walls. Chills? They’ve been constant for Brahms. Whenever you’re reading before the fire, he’ll pull you against his chest. You’re better than any blanket–all soft and warm. Whenever you’re about to move, he’ll clutch you tighter, giving a slight whimper. Don’t make him go back to being cold! _Please_. Settling back into him will earn you a contented hum as he nuzzles your hair. (Remember, if you’re good to him, he’ll be good to you.)

 **** ** **●** Wearing his cardigans.** Since he’s TALL, any of his clothing would dwarf you, making you feel extra-petite. The first time he brings you a soft wool sweater, he’d also discover that you are absolutely  _adorable_ in his clothes. Walking around in nothing but underwear and his sweater? Instant boner, cue the horny stalker…cause Brahmsy  _approves_.

 ** ****** ** **●** He’d think you’re beautiful.** Having more realistic ideals, Brahms was taught to value substance over style. You’re beautiful because you’re _you_ –not because you can fit into a certain clothing size or have a specific hairstyle. Anyone who dares to say otherwise will deal with him.

> He’d also get jealous whenever ‘rival males’ are around, not understanding the reasons behind your lowered self-esteem. _What do you mean the grocery boy wouldn’t be interested in you? No, stop shaking your head–and_ stop _laughing. This is a serious discussion!_

****●** His ogling would be blatant.** Brahms didn’t know anyone could look like you–so soft and inviting, those lush curves calling him closer. Hands itching to touch you, he’d struggle with the desire to reveal himself. If only he could feel you. Just once. Then he’d know if your skin’s as soft as he imagined. Until he makes his presence known, however, he’ll simply keep his hands clenched at his sides–the pads of his fingers pressed against rough palms. *Whimpers*

 ** **●** He’d love your gorgeous  _derrière_.** Being of a more disciplined mindset, Brahms’ parents (especially his mother) tended to censor adult content. A magazine? _Gasp! Are you mad?! What if he sees something that stirs the blood!_ The first time he sees you bent over, gifting him with a view of your backside, he’d gain a new obsession. Don’t be alarmed if he develops a certain _penchant_ for spanking.

> **Note:** As mentioned in a previous post, the best form of Brahms-Be-Gone/Brahms-Be-Have would be a spray bottle. If you’re not into spanking, just the threat of cold water will have him bowing to your will.


	2. Lactation Kink

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anonymous: Okay idk if this is your cup of tea, but I feel like Brahms would totes be down for adult breast feeding?? I feel like it would go hand in hand with how much he would like to be taken care of by his s/o. It popped into my head today and I cant let it go. (It’s like one of my only kinks besides giant murder boys)

**● Let’s be honest, Brahms would absolutely be down for that.**  Have you met him? His middle name could be _deviant_. Honestly, if you’re surprised at this point… Actually, no–there’s no way his s/o would be surprised. He’d be a kinky sex-monster from Day One.

 ** **●** Expect lots of groaning.** His voice would dip into a lower register as he massages your breast, giving you teasing nips. You’d feel the vibrations resonate to your very core. 

> **WARNING:** Contains smut.
> 
> To be even kinkier, imagine him thrusting into you, one hand at your waist to keep you still, the other hungrily pawing your chest. Only when he hears you moan his name will he release your nipple with an audible pop, his eyes darkening at your beseeching expression. 
> 
> “Brahms,” you begged. “Please.” 
> 
> “ _Y/N_ ,” he growled, straightening to tower above you like a dark omen. He roughly pushed your thighs farther apart, trapping you in place. _Thrust!_
> 
> You gave a choked cry, feeling him deep within you. Hips angled to welcome his thrusts, your body clung to him–your only anchor in a siege of pleasure. 
> 
> Oh, he knew how to move–how to snap those sinful hips at the end of each thrust, driving himself deeper as the root of his cock ground against your aching clit–sparking jolts of pleasure. 
> 
> “Oh, Brahms. You’re so _good_.” Your brows furrowed. “You’re gonna make me come…” 
> 
> He growled, arching into you. God, you were so close. Your nails dug into his ass. 
> 
> Closer. Closer.  _Closer_ …
> 
> Your back bowed, muscles gripping him in a frenzy, as he fucked you to completion. _Brahms!_  Nothing was better than this, than having him buried so deep as you came around his cock. 
> 
> _Come for me, come for me._  
> 
> You vaguely heard his anguished grunts as he finished within you, pumping jet after jet. He collapsed atop you, still softly thrusting with a dazed groan.
> 
> Several minutes passed in bleary silence as you absently pet each other.
> 
> _Brahms…_ you thought as he stroked your hair. _Mmm, Brahms._

****●** Blushing whilst breast feeding.** Brahms is an incurable voyeur. Whenever you are breast feeding, he’ll eye your breasts with a searing gaze, bringing a heated blush to your cheeks. Honestly, you’ve tried shaming him into being good, but he can’t help licking his lips.

 ** **●** You wouldn’t have to worry about breast engorgement.** Thanks to your kinky spouse, you’d be expressing breast milk on a regular basis. 

* * *

**Note:** _I know it’s rather short, but I thought the spontaneous mini-imagine would make up for it… Maybe?_


	3. Q/A: How Do Brahms' Bills Get Paid?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _**Anonymous:** Am I the only person who thinks about how the bills get paid after Brahms' parents died ?_
> 
> Damn it, Nonnie… (Immediately opens new tab and goes to Netflix) Brahms is smirking with pure smugness and I want to punch him! “I knew you couldn’t resist me, Boo…” (Gets spray bottle)

WARNING: This post talks about suicide. There are also some spoilers…

##  _**How were bills paid in the past?** _

> _First, we must look at how the bills were paid_ before _his parents’ death._

**● Where is the money coming from?**  The Heelshire’s live off of an inherited wealth–likely _old_ money. There are many clues. Anyone else notice the countless antiques? The fine carpentry in the very walls? How about those paintings–the family portraits from different eras? The house alone is likely worth millions. As for what’s inside? It’s all valuable insurance should the Heelshire’s find themselves in financial trouble.

##  _**How are they being paid now?** _

> _So, Brahms’ parents had a_ lot _of this planned out… The short answer, however, is that they’re being paid as they always were–with income earned through lands, etc. And all in his parent’s name._

****●** Their will would be useless.** Remember, they were likely living off of _inherited_ wealth. Having a will is considered mandatory in such situations. Since Brahms (their sole heir) is considered to be dead, however, said will isn’t worth much. The moment others know they’ve died Brahms becomes vulnerable to discovery. How many of us would want to explore that old house? Well, once you own it, you can. Thus, we come to a startling realization…

 ** **●** No bodies.** The Heelshire’s drowned themselves, using rocks as anchors. Now, at first I thought, “To each their own.” Not my preferred method, but I suppose it gets the job done. In hindsight, however, I realized something. The rocks were to weigh their _corpses_ down. No body = no one knows they’re dead. They simply disappear.

  * Remember, Greta doesn’t find out about their suicide until she discovers the letter. A letter, by the way, that Brahms was able to grab without notice. Meaning? He’s able to place and extract mail at will. He could easily make her believe his parents are still alive via letters in their name.



****●** Brahms and Greta.** I really _don’t_ think they’d meant it to be a set-up–at least, not at first. 

> _“We’ve had a number of potential nannies come through already. Brahms has rejected them all, though they weren’t nearly as young or as pretty.”_  - Mrs Heelshire.

They knew _why_ he’d rejected the nannies (he wants someone too whom he’s sexually attracted). This clearly made Mrs Heelshire _incredibly_ conflicted. Her entire mood screams ‘uncomfortable and riddled with guilt’. Remember, just before she leaves, she tells Greta that she’s sorry. Sorry for what? She was terrified at the idea of Greta disobeying the rules.

  * I would like to note that Brahms may have chosen differently had he known about his parent’s intentions. The reason they feared for her is because Brahms would go from ‘I’m going to creepily watch you sleep and steal your shit,’ to ‘Don’t ever leave me! Ever! Never, ever, ever!’ once he receives their letter. They knew he wouldn’t let her leave after that.



****●** Brahms didn’t know about their suicide plan.** Remember, he’s got serious abandonment issues. There’s _no way_ he’d let them leave if he knew their plans. Still, Brahms is clearly an intelligent man–they had to tell him _something_. Notice their age. Mr and Mrs Heelshire are considered elderly. Meaning? Alzheimer’s and Dementia are real risks, as are other age-related health issues. They’d likely used it to their advantage, explaining that one day they may not be able to care for him. They wanted a nanny _now_ to ease their minds.

 ** **●** Suicidology.** If one were to look at the behavior of those planning suicide, they would find that age is a major factor. Teenagers are more impulsive. The time between deciding and acting is _at most_ minutes. Why? For one, their brains aren’t fully developed, making them less likely to truly grasp the permanence of their actions. _Adults_ , however, are much different. The time between decision and action is usually stretched out–becoming anywhere from months to years. A prominent concern for many adults is dependent loved ones, and often acts as a preventative. “I have to live because ____ needs me.” Hence, the nanny. (Also, it _is_ mentioned in the film that they’d been looking for a nanny for the past year. Time-wise, it sounds about right.) 

 ** **●** What does the discovery mean for Brahms?** This all depends on Greta–giving new meaning to why Brahms would rather kill her than let her go. If she tells people what happened, he’s screwed. Pretty simple. Since she thinks he’s dead, however, he’s most likely safe. The _real_ issue is food. It just _had_ to be the grocery boy. The easiest way to solve this would be for Brahms to find them (which wouldn’t be difficult) and murder Malcolm–and Greta, now. Whoever takes over the grocery shop would continue deliveries without question.

 ** **●** Bottom Line.** The plan got screwed. What if he doesn’t decide to track them down? Brahms is resourceful. I’m guessing he’d hire a housekeeper; one who gets groceries somewhere else. It’d be grade-A sketchy for the poor person–as they’d never actually _see_ their employers (Mr and Mrs Heelshire)–but the man’s gotta eat.

* * *

##  _**BONUS:** _

What does this mean for Brahms Heelshire x OC/Reader fanfiction?

  * **Stop replacing Greta!** Maybe it’s just me, but I’ve always felt like there _has_ to be a better way of incorporating an OC. After all, Greta was an important part of Brahms as a character. She’s the first woman he’s likely ever wanted in a sexual, or romantic sense. As interesting as it would be to see things from his perspective, Brahms is adaptive. Put in a sequel situation, he’d likely try a somewhat different approach. For one thing, he’d be less trusting. He’d also tread _much_ more carefully with any possible love interest, since during the events of _The Boy_ , Brahms never seemed overly concerned with scaring Greta away. This time, he’d be acutely aware of the risks.
  * **Options for OC’s…** They could be the new housekeeper he hires. Or perhaps one could take a Jane Eyre approach. The character is hired to be a nanny by the housekeeper, with Heelshire House being a source of Gothic-esque gossip. 




	4. Character Study

##  _**Why Brahms Was Stinky** _

If you look at Brahms’ room, you can see that he prefers to keep things organized. I then had the epiphany: **what if Brahms wasn’t stinky by choice?** After all, he had his own bathtub up there. Why not use it?

 **● Sound.** Ever been in an older house? While he’s clearly mastered the silent walk, pipes are beyond Brahms’ control. Greta would have heard him filling the tub if awake.  _Any alternatives weren’t much help, either…_

  * **Bathe when she’s asleep.** But what is she wakes up? He’d have no way of knowing.
  * **Bathe at the same time as her.** If she leaves the bathroom whilst her shower’s warming up, he’s screwed. After all, he can’t be in two places at once. There’d, therefore, be a delay between Greta hearing water running and Brahms shutting it off.



****●** Discovery.** This is what he was avoiding throughout the film. Once Greta knows the water’s running, she’ll look for the source. (Or she’ll simply realize someone’s in the house.)

 ** **●** Supplies.** He’d run out of toiletries eventually, and nothing says “Human activity” quite like visible proof of a lowering supply inventory. Using Greta’s shampoo would be the riskiest (as she’d be sure to notice).

> If he did figure out a system of bathing undetected, he’d still have to face this obstacle. Once he started running low, he likely tried to stretch the time between showers.

****●** Dirty Laundry.** Again, his main goal is to avoid detection. Risking Greta finding his laundry? No. No, no, no. He wouldn’t have an infinite supply of clothing, either. Wearing each shirt for as long as possible? Clearly, yes. We all know how in-need-of-a-laundry-day attire works. 

##  _**Other Reasons for Stinky Brahms** _

****●** Grab-and-go Attire.** Remember, the confrontation occurs in the middle of the night. He could have simply changed his pants, thrown on a cardigan, and left. (It would also explain the visibly dirty undershirt. Perhaps he only wore it at night?)

 ** **●** He’d been busy.** Combined with the other factors, this makes sense. If maintaining hygiene with Greta was difficult, imagine trying to do it with not one, but _two_ extra people. After all, Malcolm had started coming over often. Add Cole, and Brahms goes from “I feel gross” to “I’m a walking mass of human sludge, I disgust myself…there is no escape.”

> Another reason he probably disliked Malcolm.

******●**** Grief.** His parents just committed suicide. This may also account for his disinterest in personal hygiene.

##  **_Signs That He Hasn’t Been Able to Bathe…_ **

******●**** His beard.** In the film, Greta tells her sister that she’s been hired to watch Brahms for ‘a few months’. Assuming he started clean-shaven, Brahms looks to have about 2-3 months worth of facial hair growth–matching with his shaggy hair, as well. 

> It’s entirely possible that Mrs Heelshire used to cut his hair for him. Either way, as seen in _The Martian_ –when trying to conserve water, or simply unable to use it, one is unable to shave.

**● His trousers.**  Notice that his pants are too big—hence the suspenders. Mr and Mrs Heelshire, however, are smartly dressed in each appearance throughout the film. _There are two explanations for this:_

  * **They had to buy his clothing in Mr Heelshire’s size.** This makes the most sense. After all, the main goal is to avoid Brahms’ discovery. _Rule #1: Don’t Draw Attention._ Being the wealthy family of their village, any oddities spark curiosity. Curiosity leads to gossip.
  * **Brahms is wearing his father’s trousers.** Again, if he’s unable to do laundry, he’d run out of clean clothing eventually.



##  **_Reasons Why Brahms Would Have_ Wanted _to Be Clean_**

****●** Greta.** Have you ever liked someone? As in _liked_ liked? Ever notice the way a crush can spark an instant self-makeover? It’s human–no, _animal_ –nature. After all, most are willing to go pretty far to attract their desired mate.

> Now, have you ever gone out _sans_ -shower, only to run into the object of your affections? Let me guess: you’d wanted the earth to swallow you whole so as to escape the agony of feeling repellant. 
> 
> Since Brahms has a crush on Greta, need I say more?

******●**** He’s not naturally sloppy. **Notice his room. It’s organized. Meaning? Brahms prefers to keep things tidy.

* * *

##  **_Brahms’ Use of Voices_ **

Once discovered, Brahms uses three different voices: child, dark, and his natural intonation. Apart from his natural voice, Brahms alters his speaking so as to manipulate Greta.

 ** **●** The Young Brahms/Brahmsy Voice.** He knows Greta is maternal. Whether he knows about her miscarriage is up for debate. (While he wasn’t outside when the audience discovered this, it’s possible she’d spoken to her sister on the phone about it.) Still, the fact that she’s dealing with the grief and guilt over not being able to protect her own child makes her an easy target.

 ** **●** The Abusive Voice.** Brahms is an intelligent man. (We know this because he’s highly educated–poetry, music, etc., as well as resourceful.) He’d figure out that Greta had been abused pretty quickly. Now, if he’d watched her interactions with Cole, he’d know that she’s susceptible to obedience via intimidation. When he says, “Greta. Get back here,” he’s imitating Cole as his voice goes from a sympathetic “Greta,” to the threatening growl “Get back here,” implying that she’s displeased him.

 ** ** **●**** His Natural Voice.** Once he sees that the abusive voice is simply scaring her, Brahms–in a panic–switches to his natural voice. We can hear it when he says, “I’ll kill him–just like the others!” His tone becomes desperate and heartbroken. It’s his version of a plea.

* * *

##  **_Why He Pushes Greta_ **

He’s justifiably angry. Not just at Cole, but at Greta herself. Once you look at her behavior as a nanny, you’ll quickly understand why. 

 ** ** **●**** She broke ALL the major rules.** It doesn’t matter if Brahms is a doll. When she accepted the job, she’d agreed to the rules. If she’d been this blatant about ignoring them in many other workplaces, she’d have been dismissed. 

 ** ** **●**** Nanny Rule #1: Ensure the Child’s Safety. **So…she broke this the second she decided to handle Cole herself. If Brahms were an actual child, this would be potentially life-threatening, as Cole is an unstable individual with a history of strong violence. She should have called 999 the _moment_ she knew he was in the house.

> Imagine if Cole had attacked her (which is entirely possible since he threatened to use force to make her come back with him). What if Brahms–a child who’d likely bonded with Greta–tried to defend her? Remember, Cole’s the same man who put Greta (his pregnant girlfriend) in the hospital. Just…no, Greta. _No_.

******●**** Nanny Rule #2: Follow the House Rules. **No guests? That’s an important rule. Again, she’s in someone else’s home. It’s not her place to invite people over–especially when she’s explicitly _not_ been given permission. It’s a violation of trust and her employer’s home.

> After all, it’s _not her house_. If her employers don’t feel comfortable with other people visiting while they’re away, she needs to respect that. Simply put, not her house = not her decision to make.

********●****** In defense of Greta…** Let’s be honest, under the circumstances, she did try her best. The way Greta handled things was realistic, as she’s a flawed human being just like everyone else. Does this change the fact that she made the wrong choices? No. Does it mean Brahms is wrong to be angry? Not really. Wouldn’t you be offended if you hired someone to watch your children and she pulled the stuff she did?

> I feel like a major reason she broke so many rules is also that she knew no one would tell on her. Let’s be honest, if you’re watching someone else’s kids, part of the reason you act the way you do is because you know everything that happens is getting repeated to the parents.

* * *

##  _**BONUS: If Greta Had Studied Demonology** _

**********●******** So, I noticed Greta wears a cross.** An interesting belief of Christians (and many other major religions) is that children are innocent, making them incapable of committing sin. Thus, their souls are pure–unblemished by sin. Meaning? If this is true, then upon their death, children go straight to heaven as they have nothing for which to atone or be cleansed. 

 ** ** ** ** **●******** Simply put, ghost children are impossible.** So what does that make a spirit claiming to be a child? A liar. Even scarier, though, it means it’s most likely a demon. 

> Yup, ghost child = demon in disguise. 

**********●******** But _why?_** A pretty basic lesson in demonology is that demons want to ultimately possess people. Fortunately for us, they need permission. While you’d never openly invite a demon into your life, the tragically trapped soul of a child may be a different story.

 ** ** ** ** **●******** Now, do you see what I’m getting at?** Simply put, if Greta had known about the Ghost-Children-Don’t-Exist Rule, she’d likely have run in the opposite direction. 

> Mainly because engaging with a demon means you’re giving them permission to f*ck with you. (That’s why you should _never_ address spirits unless you know what you’re doing.)


	5. Reaction to Jump Scares

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **Quick Context:** if you follow me on tumblr, you'll know that I've undertaken the endeavor to replenish the library of slasher gifs. It started with Thomas Hewitt, but has grown to cover Brahms, Jason, Yautja and the Slashstreet Boys.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can’t…he’s just too adorable! That little jump humanizes him so much. I’m pretty sure Brahms is the only horror character I’ve seen legitimately startled by someone.

 

 **● Too much adrenaline.** Brahms lives a rather boring life. Aside from the occasional stab wound via Greta, he’s used to a monotonous existence filled with poetry and classical music. Even intenser genres of music would freak him out. 

> **Note:** Seriously, if you like heavy metal, the first time you play it, he’ll have a mini-heart attack. At the sudden blaring of drums and guitar, he’d shoot out of his chair and bang his head on the overhead lamp. 

****●** He’d probably shout.** Again, Brahms is probably very jumpy during horror movies. While he’s usually able to hide, nothing can save him from the terror of the images before him. *Tries to slyly escape* Where are you going? Brahms, Y/N needs you to protect them! He’s essentially the scary bad-boy boyfriend who’s actually terrified of spiders…even though he’s been sent to kill one. 

> **Note:** He probably gives himself pep-talks, too. _Come on, mate, it’s just a little bug…you can do this._ *Takes deep breath* _Be a man. Okay, spider, you’re going down._  

****●** He’d keep watching the movie.** Curiosity is a powerful thing. While he’d _want_ to look away, part of him would crave the thrill. Still, once he’s faced with the post-movie fears? _That’s it! Brahms is done with these cruel films!_ *One week later* _Let’s watch a scary movie!_

 ** ** **●**** You’d cling to each other for dear life–all the while hiding behind a wall of protective pillows.** After mapping out multiple escape roots (should a surprise attack occur), you’d each have a weapon of defense within reaching distance. As blades would be strictly prohibited for safety reasons, blunt force objects would prove the most popular. 


	6. Why Brahms Sucks at Consent

**Short Answer:** His entire understanding of romantic relationships is based on classical books, poems, and plays.

> _Warning: This post talks about rape._

****●** His parents never taught him differently.** They hadn’t thought Brahms would be in a relationship, so why would they teach him about the do’s and don’t’s of love? Mrs Heelshire’s demeanor as she commented on Greta’s appearance hints at how rattled both parents are. Brahms having sexual desires? Something to avoid at all costs.

 **● Vintage romance novels.** Brahms is smart. He also clearly longs for a sexual–if not full-blown romantic–relationship with the  _fairer sex_. Now: if you are a thirty-something year old virgin with zero experience, what would you do? Research. Ah-ha! Yet Brahms can’t google  _‘how to get laid’,_ now can he? He’d, therefore, turn to his next best option: books.

 ** **●** He read the WRONG books.** Just looking at the house itself, you _know_ the library consists entirely of classical texts. (This is confirmed by Mrs Heelshire when she asks Greta about poetry.) Now, what valuable love lessons do these old books teach? _Outdated_  and _woefully inaccurate_ ones. In short, they misdefine the concept of consent.

> **Note:** For example, rape is only when a man _violently_ forces himself on a woman, or the idea that coercion is okay because ‘no’ means ‘persuade me’. (It can also only happen between a male rapist and female victim.)
> 
> **What is Consent?** When the person _actively_ agrees to have sex. Drunk, unconscious, or otherwise impaired? It’s rape. Coercion? Yes, still rape.

******●**** Brahms never learned the concept of equal rights.** The idea that women are equal was not around during the time of publication. He’d, therefore, learn that females are more tools than human beings. They exist to fill specific roles–all of which revolve around their relationship with a man (and that they prefer it this way).

 ** **●** He might have thought he was the hero.** Yeah…I know. In many old–but _not_ classic–romances, women are given the intellect and mental fortitude of children. They throw fits, lack basic awareness of other human beings, and are both stubborn yet easily manipulated. They also ‘play at romance’. In other words, a noble male must earn her love–or rather, the female herself–through selfless acts (saving her, giving up something he wants in order to help her, etc).

##  **By Classical Romance Logic, _Brahms_ is the Hero. **

> Why? Prepare to either laugh at the absurdity or cry for the shit women had to deal with. _Warning: Severe sarcasm and shade._
> 
> **Note:** I’m talking about the average books written during the Regency through Victorian Era. While the gems (Jane Eyre, Pride & Prejudice, etc) are immortalized classics, the costume jewelry novels were…I seriously have no words. (Hell, even Anne references it in Jane Austen’s  _Persuasion_.)

****●** He’s a gentleman.** When a man yearns for a woman with such vigor, he can often grow helpless in the face of such overwhelming passion. Though his desire burned with raging, even  _torturous_ intensity, Brahms never succumbed. He never _once_ allowed himself to put his lady love in harms’ way. Essentially, he _could’ve_ raped her, but he didn’t.

 ** **●** He’s loyal.** (Whereas Greta is not.) I’m talking slut-shaming, people. While Brahms ached from afar, ever-true to the object of his fervent affections, Greta was accepting the attentions of another man.

> **Note:** He’s also benevolent in his ability to selflessly forgive Greta her transgression.

****●** _He’s_ the one to save Greta.** Where was Malcolm when her abusive ex-lover came calling? Refusing to defend Greta, that’s where.  _Brahms_ , on the other hand, managed to skillfully dispatch Greta’s relentless tormentor.

 ** **●** He _knows_ her.** Being a voyeuristic stalker is generally okay in classical romance logic. After all, Greta should be flattered. She’d garnered the attentions of a wealthy and eligible man–one in possession of estate and lands. 

> **Note:**  Single females are _always_ open to male suitors. In fact, they require such masculine attention to avoid a withering constitution. It’s just _science_. 


	7. Brahms Probably Had a Boner During This Scene

__

##  **Am I the only one who thinks Brahms had an erection during this scene?**

_Allow me to give an unwanted explanation as to why…_

**● He’s either angry or turned on.** Just _look_ at the way he’s breathing! He’s not Jason Voorhees, his chest doesn’t naturally heave when at rest. While he could be trying to dominate or punish Greta, Brahms doesn’t use physical intimidation against her at any other point in the film. 

> Remember, he _wants_ her to stay. He, in fact, begs her in the previous scene–promising that he’ll ‘be good’.

******●**** We _know_ Brahms is attracted to Greta.** It’s the reason he chose her at the start of the film. From the Greta-doll, it’s clear Brahms craves physical contact with the real Greta. Considering this is the first time he’s been within touching distance–aside from the whole dragging her moment–is it surprising he’s on edge?

 **● He’s not used to face-to-face interaction.**  We’re probably seeing Brahms’ first time being this close to _any_  woman his age. With that in mind, he could very well be trying not to come… Because we _all_ know he’s had _at least_ one wet dream about being able to smell her hair or feel her breath on his skin.

 ** **●** He knows that she found his room.** He also knows she found out about his parents, (because he _probably_ heard her reading the letter out loud). Is it possible he took her coming back as an acceptance of his wants? 

> Remember, Brahms has -10% experience with romance.


	8. Being Married to Him

**● Lots of playtime.**  As a healthy part of human life, Brahms has sorely missed the ability to let go and be silly over the years. Having you around would slowly chip away at his ingrained caution. Expect rounds of tag, hide-and-seek, and more!

> **Note:**  Another game you’ll enjoy is Hide and Find. In this, one player hides an object and the other tries to find it. Brahms, of course, would be merciless in his efforts to coax forth clues. (To the point of orgasm denial if necessary.)

**● Listening to Brahms Speak.**  Not only is he one of the few vocal slashers, but Brahms is also a wonderful storyteller. From his own version of  _The Odyssey_  to Shakespeare’s  _The Taming of the Shrew_ , you’ll never be bored. Just curl up in his arms and enjoy the rumbling vibrations as you rest your cheek against his chest.

 **● Seeing Brahms the Man.**  No one can deny–Brahms is  _amazing_  at playing a child. Yet a child is the last thing he wants to be in your eyes. He’s a man, Y/N. He wants to tower over you with mere inches between his body and yours. He wants to sweep you off your feet and carry you to bed. He wants to be  _strong_  in your eyes.

> **Note:**  Remember, all his adult-life-lessons were learned via 19th-century readings. He’s going to have some antiquated ideas about gender roles.

**● Kinky Sex.**  We all know Brahms is into as many kinks as you’d allow, but he’s also got an inventive side. Don’t be surprised when your amateur engineer offers forth a cornucopia of sex toy inventions—all in need of a willing guinea pig.

 **● Home Renovations.**  The house is now yours and his. Want to change up the master bedroom? Go for it! How about getting a– _gasp!_ –TV? He will  _begrudgingly_  allow strangers into his home for such a technological treasure.

 **● Installing an Automatic Gate.**  Thus, any visitors would need to be buzzed in at the edge of the property. (It currently has a manual gate.) Meaning? No surprise guests = Brahms being able to walk freely outside.

> **Note:**  The manor is surrounded by forest, making it unable to be seen from the gate.

**● Gardening.**  If we study Brahms’ room, we may notice the odd plant pots. Apparently, Brahmsy has a green thumb. With the new gate in place, he’d finally be able to garden to his heart’s content.

> **Note:**  Seeds and clippings would make a wonderful birthday gift. His favorite would be century roses. Being an old soul, the longevity would appeal to him.

##  **BONUS:**

**● Introducing Him to Pop-Culture.** Hogwarts house?  _Slytherin_. Jedi or Sith?  _Clearly_  Sith. Oh, and don’t forget all the Disney movies. And videogames–cause you  _know_  he’d become a major gamer. Also, Marvel and DC. Really the list is endless.

> **Note:**  And  _Lord of the Rings_ …

**● The internet.**  And all that entails. Google, Youtube, Amazon, eBay,  _BOOdalinski on Tumblr_ , Reddit, Archive of Our Own… Not to mention Pornhub…  _(Yes, he will want to make a sex tape…)_

 **● Cellphones.**  Imagine texting Brahms. Just… _imagine it_. Now stop. Texting isn’t what would blow Brahms’ naughty mind. Oh no… I’m talking about cellphone  _cameras_  because let’s be honest: the only thing stopping Brahms from being a photography-inclined stalker is the lack of camera.  _Are you saying he can take pictures silently?_  As in ‘without detection’?  _*Clearly getting ideas*_


	9. Character Study 2

##  **_Brahms’ Childhood…_ **

**● Brahms was an only child.**  While this isn’t blatantly said, it’s heavily implied. Now, why was he an only child? After all, as discussed in a [previous post](https://boodalinski.tumblr.com/post/181761906995/am-i-the-only-person-who-thinks-about-how-the), the Heelshires come from inherited money. They’d be expected to have an heir and a spare. The fact that this didn’t happen points to a variety of possible reasons.

 **● His parents may have had fertility issues.**  I’d like to acknowledge the family portrait depicting Mr. and Mrs. Heelshire as 40+ years old when Brahms was only a child. While this may have been a filming mistake, age  _is_  a factor when trying to conceive. 

> **Note:**  This would also make them more likely to coddle and indulge Brahms.

**● He was _probably_  homeschooled.** Firstly, no one has first-hand accounts of Brahms. If he’d been in school, people would’ve remembered him. Secondly, in such class systems, Brahms would’ve had a private tutor. 

 **● He was relatively isolated from other children.**  This would be why Emily visited every weekend. Brahms–like any child–needs social interactions with his peers to develop critical communication skills. Thus, Brahms has extremely underdeveloped social skills. He would also be more likely to form extreme attachments to the few individuals he knows.

##  **_Why Did He Kill Emily?_ **

> **Warning:**  It’s going to come across as brutal Brahms-slamming…but I’m really not trying to do that.

**● He saw her as an object.**  If you’ve ever watched a legitimately spoiled child, you’ll quickly notice a lack of respect toward other people. They’re taught that they matter more than others. As such, Brahms undoubtedly viewed Emily as someone who existed merely to please him. (And when she didn’t do this, he lashed out.)

 **● He was spoiled.**  As an observation, typically the longer parents wait to introduce discipline, the more resistance they face. I once met a child that had  _extreme_  anger issues when told ‘no’. He simply had no way of coping with not getting his way. (And left plenty of bruises as a result.) Likewise, this is what made Brahms so dangerous.

 **● He wasn’t taught the concept of responsibility.**  When a child makes a mess there are two options: clean it up yourself or have them clean it up. It’s rather obvious that Brahms is used to someone else cleaning up his messes. He, therefore, lacked a basic understanding of actions and consequences.

> **Note:**  For example, if Brahms broke his favorite toy only to have it replaced the next day, he’d never learn that breaking a toy means not having it anymore.

##  **_Where They Went Wrong…_ **

> **Quick Note:**  While I’ll be pointing out where the Heelshire’s probably went wrong, I  _don’t_  hold any judgement toward them. Parenting is  _hard_. End of story.

**● He lacked discipline.**  Brahms has never had to obey boundaries–not really. Probably the epitome of a spoiled little shit, Brahms was the kid who completely melts down if he doesn’t get his way. And how did his parents handle it? If not with discipline, then with bribes. It’s the classic bribe-for-obedience situation with him.

 **● Seriously, they gave Brahms _too much_  control.** This is shown when Brahms throws repeated tantrums until getting his way. (He literally  _killed_ nannies he didn’t like. That is the behavior of a child in control as opposed to the parents.) Rule Number One with children?  _You_ make the rules–not the other way around. You are the one in charge, the one in power. Otherwise, there’s zero respect.

> _“Now, it may seem a bit silly, but it is important that you follow them [the rules] because Brahms is not like other children. He can be…particular. I’m afraid we may have indulged him a bit over the years.” - Mr. Heelshire_

##  **_Is Brahms a Lost Cause?_ **

**● No.**  His biggest saving grace is the fact that he desperately craves human companionship. Having that leverage would mean more than you might think. You’d have to take baby steps, but if you simply refuse to accept disrespect and are open about it, he’d slowly reform himself. Just…be consistent.

##  **BONUS:**

_What You’d Introduce Him to…_

**● The internet.**  And all that entails. Google, Youtube, Amazon, eBay,  _BOOdalinski on Tumblr_ … Not to mention Pornhub…

 **● Cellphones.**  Imagine texting Brahms. Just…imagine it. Now stop. Texting isn’t what would blow Brahms’ naughty mind. Oh no… I’m talking about cellphone  _cameras_  because let’s be honest: the only thing stopping Brahms from being a photography-inclined stalker is the lack of camera.  _Are you saying he can take pictures silently?_  As in ‘without detection’?


End file.
